Thursday 20 October 2011

State of...Fatherhood


Lots going on at work, lots going on in life. Now that I have a few hours sitting on a train from Toronto to Windsor I thought that I should put down a few thoughts to blog.

In case I haven't told you, my wife and I are expecting our first child in late January (obviously not pictured above). Thank you! We pulled the goalie and my little swimmers did the rest. Swimming genes must run in the family. Below are the real pictures of our little Jedi (that bottom one with the hoodie on he/she DOES look like a Jedi).

So we are now just a few months away from our next Life Changing event. Friends with kids tell me to 'get my sleep now', 'get a routine', 'breast feed', 'don't breast feed'....it's all very informative to hear people's own experiences...am I'm sure I will be no different in several months time giving out free advice to others in my shoes.

I was talking to another friend who is expecting their first. They are about 6 weeks behind where we are but going through similar experiences. We talked about names; how that name will be with our child for the rest of their lives (unless they play NFL football and they can change it to a spanish number, or become a singer who wants to change a bad name for a symbol). FOR. THE. REST. OF. THEIR. LIVES. Think about that for a second. I've lived with a unique name, through good and bad (mostly good)...but now the pressure is squarely on us. We will determine if that child gets ridiculed for the rest of their life. What if choose poorly? Beth would be a nice name for a girl...but her name would sound like a hotel chain. What about something nice like Savannah? Do you think that she would be born wearing stripper clothes or wait until she was 15? And boys names are no easier. Don't want to be too 'normal' but at the same time, I don't want him getting beaten up. And more importantly, how does it sounds as a hockey name?

We are currently going through the 'babying' of our house. Not baby proofing yet...just babying. That means getting the nursery painted...which means getting the guest bedroom done (so we can move the den/nursery items into the guest room), and also getting the basement done (so we can move the den/nursery items into the basement- and start my/our ManCave). Only then can we begin to work on the nursery.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. Not in the least. I enjoy fixing up the house. I enjoy planning for our baby to be brought home. I really enjoy planning for the ManCave. I'm just saying that it's a lot of work - and trust me, I know it's not about to get any easier when the little munchkin comes home. Maybe I SHOULD be getting my sleep now while I still can?!

I was told once that when a couple has their first child they lose contact with 80% of their friends. #IHaveNoStatsToBackThisUp (thanks John Stewart) but that sounds terrible. I look at my closest friends and know/hope that this doesn't happen to me. But I fear that the old 'that won't happen to me/us' phrase gets thrown around too much. So I urge my friends to stay in touch. I can only imagine that the 80% number is mostly due to the couple having the child. Unless our friends hate our baby, I can't see how that would be any different. It's up to us to try and maintain that friendship through the insanity of babyhood. But I want you all to know that I don't want to lose touch with you (except those who know who you are)...so let's not let it happen. Okay?

I'm sure that the next six months will have a LOT of family time. Lot's of mothers and fathers, mothers-in-law and fathers-in-law, brothers, sisters, brothers-in-law and sisters-in-law. I thank my lucky stars that I have good ones of each. I feel sorry for those people who have issues with the "monster-in-law". That must make things ten times worse on everyone. I need to remember to treat them all nicely - they are all potential babysitters!!!

Okay, that's about all I have. My station is coming up. Life is good. Wife is good. Work is good. I really have nothing to complain about right now. Disgusting isn't it?!

Cheers,
LW

1 comment:

  1. Good piece. Having a child does change how you interact with some of your friends but I think it actually strengthens your contact with lots of them...especially those who have kids (or eventually want them). You'll have a whole new way to relate to people and a new appreciation of how we all interconnect. Nothing makes me crazier or happier than being a dad. Nothing. Period.

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